Saturday, March 10, 2012

You're So Pretty

My dear devoted husband, the man I sweatily vowed my undying love and devotion to almost thirteen years ago before a preacher man on a sweltering August night , the one I would do anything for, the one I consider Superman on Earth (no, really, that is his assigned ring tone on my phone), just called me stupid.  Yeah, that's right.  Stupid.  You better back it up there cowboy, 'cause I know where you park your spurs.  Well...unless of course Baby Chick tries to hijack our bed again.  After the game of musical beds that is sure to follow, I am not sure where you sleep, but make no mistake, I will find you.

He did not actually say the words, "you are stupid".  He would never do that because he is a smart man.  He instead says, "you're so pretty".  That is Daddy Owl code for, "you are seriously dumber than a box of rocks."

It was all because for a brief nano second I could not figure out where the replacement light bulb on the top of Baby Chick's mini fish tank went.  A mini fish tank, mind you, that I put together.  I suppose informing you of that does not help my case.  Anyway, I did find where the replacement bulb should go and did the deed, but not before the patronizing head patting began with his "you're so pretty".

I hate being told that.  Well, of course I do not hate being told if it is from someone who actually means it.  I do not like being looked at like a helpless female, so when he infers with his poor choice of words that I am not capable, it only makes me want to do it even more.  Once, just to prove to him I could, I hauled a very heavy potted plant out the door on a dolly only to injure myself in the process.  Yeah boy, I showed him.

After he spoke the unfortunate words this morning, I swiftly reminded him of the tasks I have completed with no help from anyone thank you very much:
  • Painted entire rooms
  • Installed ceiling fans
  • Refinished furniture
  • Hung mini-blinds
To be completely fair, these were mostly done in my previous life with a previous husband and it was either me complete the tasks or they simply would not get done.  To continue the fairness party, Daddy Owl is usually much better than me at completing the mechanical issues in the running of our household.  There is just not a whole lot I can call him "pretty" for because he can pretty much do anything.  Dang it.

On the other hand, I would love to be considered an ugly witch when it comes to certain tasks, like laundry, dishes, toilet scrubbing (see Occupy Toilet Bowl - Day 1).  I have yet to be called "pretty" for any of these things.  Interesting...


  1. I am pretty independant also! Over the years though it has come to pass that I REALLY am the more handy one :) Although my hubby has learned to do alot of the bigger jobs around the house. Yay! Thank you so much for adding me to your required reading..I am humbled. Let's stay in touch and blessings to you!

  2. Stopping by from the Bloggy Moms Blog Hop!